The views expressed in this blog are not necessarily the views of The Journey Church (in other words, I didn't talk these through with Lead Team or with our Staff to get consensus). I'm simply sharing where I believe things shake out after a study of Scripture. Today, we're talking some specifics - tomorrow, and Friday, I'll be answering questions that people asked from last Sunday.
If you didn't read yesterday's post, please read it first. We talked about what was okay and not okay according to the Bible when it comes to married sex (which according to the Bible is the only legitimate place for sexual relationships).
So . . . what about oral sex? Doesn't include animals, doesn't include third parties. Is it mutually agreed upon by husband and wife and is it doing harm to anyone? That's the question you need to ask each other in the marriage bed. Let me thow out a question I heard once. "It's okay to kiss every other part of the body, but is it not okay to kiss or touch our genitals?" It may be wrong for you as a couple. But, it doesn't seem to me that the Bible prohibits couples if they want to make that part of their marriage bed experience.
Okay, how about sex toys? Doesn't include animals, doesn't include third parties (although, I would argue, it could - if you are for example using a . . . (yup, I'm going there) dildo that's modeled after some real person, or if it's causing you to fantasize about someone else. The last question, again will only be answerable by you as a couple - Is it mutually agreed upon and is it doing harm to anyone? This is a little more tricky. Could potentially a sex toy, like a vibrator, cause you to become dependent on that to experience pleasure? Does it give you and your spouse an "easy way out" from figuring out how to pleasure one another effectively? Both of those questions are up for debate, but certainly things worth thinking about. Do sex toys cause you to seek your own release instead of "bothering" your spouse, and you end up missing out on the intimacy you both could share? Again, those are just questions worth pondering. Some people might say - well, where can you buy them - you'll be supporting some porn place. That's a valid point. There are actually, a number of Christian based sex toy online shops that (I'm told . . . really!) feature no live models or nudity, etc. for Christian married couples. Again, I believe according to my understanding of the Bible, that sex toys are not prohibited, but do need to addressed with some caution. In many respects, they can function like other "props" you may use in your marriage bed (like music, pillows, some type of lubrication, banana split sundae's - I just said that to mess with you all!!).
Okay - these posts are WAY TOO LONG! So, I'm staying away from masterbation - but if I get enough anonymous (or not) comments asking to talk about it - I'll take that on as well.
Okay, leave, your comments and questions. What concerns, thoughts do you have?? Anyone dare?